MM MECC ANICA

No longer fighting the current. No longer being the rock. No longer trying to form things around yourself. Letting go of desires and the prisons they create.

Go with the flow, let your transformation be your strength; not your resistance. Stop congratulating yourself for your fortitude in a situation that doesn’t need to exist.

While this isn’t a new concept to me, It wasn’t until after a series of awakening life events that I started to see how prevalent it was in every aspect of my life.

During a river crossing on a fly fishing trip in Portugal this past fall, I hear our guide yelling to me over the deafening turbulence of churning river bottom and riverside branches in a waist deep torrent from a dam release supercharged by an outgoing tide…

“Walk downstream!!!! Why are you fighting the water?!?”

Why was I fighting the water? Perhaps years of destination and deliverable based judgement self imposed by the voice saying, “If you don’t do it this way, you will be failing.” This may sound hyperbolic, but it’s how my brain worked.

I was the rock attempting to tell the water how to flow, slowly getting worn down over time, weakening with every storm and surge. The water, well, it was water; it came, it transformed around, it went.

I began walking at a 45 degree angle pointed downstream with my new friend. What was once a struggle, now became a moonwalk assisted by my friend’s engulfing hands pushing against my back on the journey.

_______

Much of my life I’ve had this fear that my “luck was going to run out.”

While I’ve been fortunate in the direction my life has headed and worked damn hard at achieving it, I never gave myself credit for why the biggest and best decisions in my life have seemingly come without much turmoil. I used to look back at those and think, “fuck, I was lucky,” but as I overlay this concept onto past experiences, these moments were so easy because I let more than my brain make the decision… I went with the flow…I stopped fighting…I was the water, not the rock. I didn’t control it then, but I have a grasp on it now.